dirty poems

Morning Conversation

By John Dobby Boe

One morning I was sitting at the kitchen table Reading the sports page when my wife came home From an early doctor’s appointment She started complaining about the mammogram She had just endured, but I paid little attention, Immersed as I was in the newspaper. Irritated, she finally asked me, “How would you like your [...]

Luck

By John Dobby Boe

She would have ended up awfully high strung, But I fucked her brains out when she was young.

Marital Relations

By John Dobby Boe

I was reading the sports page, At our breakfast nook table, When my wife brought up The mammogram experience She had had the day before. She wanted sympathy, and I gave her none. Frustrated, trying to make me understand What she had been through, She asked me, “How would you like to have your balls [...]

Bubbles

By John Dobby Boe

I was at the Y, shooting baskets, When a young woman came in And told me I would have to leave, As they were setting up for kindergym. I had just started, so I asked if I really had to go. “You can stay, if you want To sit on a mat and blow bubbles?” [...]

Educating Boys

By John Dobby Boe

Educating Boys She was a college English teacher Of a certain age, Sexy and beautiful, Dressing like a cross Between a gypsy And a call girl. Once, near the end of a semester, Of a Freshman English class, One of her male students Couldn’t take it any longer. He had a courageous moment And at [...]

Good Vibrations in the Afterlife

By John Dobby Boe

When I die I want to be cremated And have my ashes Put in a dildo, For my widow To remember me by. I could fuck her After death If only I could find A combination Crematorium And sex shop.

The Only Good Ism

By John Dobby Boe

I don’t want Anarchism, Atheism, Agnosticism, Communism, Conservatism, Egoism, Deism, Fascism, Legalism, Liberalism, Nationalism, Populism, Positivism, Pragmatism, Scientism, Socialism, Spiritualism, Stoicism, or Transcendentalism. The only good ism is jism.

The Best Business Plan Ever

By John Dobby Boe

Had two new office managers, A man and a woman, Who were doing their first annual review, Where each agent would be asked About their goals for the year. And so Chuck, this supercool Motorcyle-riding real estate agent Was called in for his review. “What are your goals for the year?” he was asked. He [...]

Mourning Judy

By John Dobby Boe

Having been married for forty years I notice the stories people tell Of spouses’ deaths, How when the wife died, The husband died Within a week. I am sure too That if my darling Judy Were to die before me I would die Within a week. My heart couldn’t take The pain of the grief [...]

Dirty Renaissance poem, translated from Latin

By John Dobby Boe

I plan to use this blog to post poems, translations, stories, thoughts, and jokes, most of them my own, many of them dirty. Some of you might object that I should use the term “erotic” rather than “dirty,” arguing, “Sex isn’t dirty.” I say that if you don’t think sex is dirty, then you’ve never [...]